It’s always difficult when parents divorce. Custody issues don’t just affect your day-to-day lives, but they also affect important events.
A lot of parents aim to keep their split as amicable and as simple as possible to avoid lengthy court battles. For many, that means splitting custody down the middle. The children will spend one week with you and one week with their other parent, in what seems like an equitable solution – until the holiday season comes around or some other important event, like birthdays.
Some days matter more than others when it comes to custody
Much like there are some cards in a pack that carry more value than others, some days of the year are also considered more valuable by most people. Parents, in particular, may feel like they are missing out on important events by not having their children with them on birthdays (their own or their child’s), Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas and certain other holidays.
That makes it important to negotiate carefully around those days, rather than simply having the custody schedule operate as usual. Depending upon how you and your coparent can work together, you can opt for:
- Alternating holidays of importance, so that each of you will have your child every other holiday, the entire holiday
- Sharing time on holidays and important dates, so that each of you has your child for half the day on a holiday
- A more complex schedule, which may be most appropriate if you celebrate different holidays and place more importance on different dates
You should think about how to handle these high-value days when drawing up your custody and parenting plan. Building in some flexibility is also wise. With legal guidance to learn more about your options, you can create a plan that works better for everyone involved.